Dating within alcoholics anonymous plumper dating
New ppl are vulnerable and when they take the focus off their sobriety, and put more effort into pursuing the opposite sex there is usually trouble.
I really believe too that its really none of my business if ppl in the fellowship want to date each other. GG, There are so many reasons why it's suggested to take a year off from relationships to get sober.
So I guess I figured with the odds already stacked against me, I needed to remove ANYTHING and EVERYTHING that stood in my way of getting and staying sober.
That meant listening with an open mind, and believing that people were giving me suggestions that really worked.
He may or may not be right, but he HASN'T lied to me yet, so why should I question him on this one?
first off, I know the AA recommendation about not dating during your first year of sobriety. :) My ex-boyfriend and I broke up a couple of months ago (completely amicable, he moved to Chicago to start grad school and the distance just became unsustainable, I live in San Francisco). He's great, seems very stable and self-aware, he doesn't drink (not in the program but just chooses not to).
My ex has been great and supportive, he was also in the program and recently shared with me some of the things that went wrong in the disastrous relationship he got into at 3 months sober -- being overly vulnerable, got attached too quickly, and lost focus on himself and his recovery, as a way of helping me know what pitfalls to look out for.
Those women had to try and earn a space in my life, prove their value over time.
I didn't need them, and I wisely chose ones that didn't need me, which is a scary concept if you stop and think about it. The common knowledge in AA is no personal relationships for the 1st year, and certainly no emotional relationships.
Take care of "you" first and a wonderful life awaits. Well let me go see some new faces of hope and life.. The relationship was not a trigger for me though I can tell you what happened.