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He loved them; he grabbed them — and sprayed milk all over us. I liked him too fast, too much, but he stood firm in not wanting a relationship.Disappointed but undaunted, I took to OKCupid, challenging myself to learn how to meet men, talk to them, and maybe even learn to trust them.So stop looking for super hot chemistry and butterflies when you first meet. Ignore those men, and seek out the guys who want a relationship with someone they can relate to. A mature woman who values herself doesn’t want to date a man who’s a victim or stuck in the past. Guys, correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe there’s a ‘lid for every pot’, a body type for every guy. Wherever you live, I promise you are not geographically undesirable (hello online dating, Face Time, and airplanes).It’s not likely to happen like that at this age, and on the rare occasions when it does, the relationship is usually based on nothing more than lust. Some men like thin women, some like curvier figures. A man who never graduated college might be brilliant (Steve Jobs). ◊♦◊ Just about any problem you have in dating can be overcome. You don’t have to speak multiple languages, live in a big city, or have a perfect body. Dating problems begin to disappear when you overcome your insecurities and limiting beliefs about the opposite sex.I started earning enough to put my younger daughter in daycare full-time. Most proudly held up dead animals they’d killed — earning them a left swipe from me.Eventually I had to start talking to some of the ones I’d matched with.
Six months earlier, I’d felt like I was a situation someone had to take on out of the kindness of their heart.
I didn’t find one person to like and latch on to like a kitten thrown into a tub of water.
Instead, I playfully splashed, batted eyes, and flirted heavily. I saw myself as someone to be won over, instead of the other way around.
When we got to our room, my body became a thing of beauty, filled with fire and lust.
My breasts were no longer bags of liquid food, they were round and full. After my second daughter was born, I lost my sex drive completely for more than a year. Then a friend suggested a guy who could have easily passed for Ryan Gosling’s cousin.
After a couple of months of trying to fit in some spot I wasn’t meant for, I withdrew into a place of plummeting self-esteem.